GREGORY OF NYSSA: Life of Macrina, 375
EST.
THE EVENTS OF THE NEXT DAY: MACRINA'S LAST
HOURS
But when day came it was clear to me from what I
saw that the coming day was the utmost limit of her life in the
flesh, since the fever had consumed all her innate strength. But
she, considering the weakness of our minds, was contriving how to
divert us from our sorrowful anticipations, and once more with those
beautiful words of hers poured out what was left of her suffering
soul with short and difficult breathing. Many, indeed, and
varied, were the emotions of my heart at what I saw. For nature
herself was afflicting me and making me sad; as was only to be
expected, since I could no longer hope ever to hear such a voice
again. Nor as yet was I reconciled to the thought of losing the
common glory of our family, but my mind, as it were inspired by the
spectacle, supposed that she would actually rise superior to the
common lot. For that she did not even in her last breath find
anything strange in the hope of the Resurrection, nor even shrink at
the departure from this life, but with lofty mind continued to
discuss up to her last breath the convictions she had formed from
the beginning about this life — all this seemed to me more than human.
Rather did it seem as if some angel had taken human form with a sort
of incarnation, to whom it was nothing. A strange that the mind
should remain undisturbed, since he had no kinship or likeness with
this life of flesh, and so the flesh did not draw the mind to think
on its afflictions. Therefore [note: In order to assure them that
she was really dying, she uttered aloud the prayer in the next
paragraph. I think she revealed to the bystanders that divine and
pure love of the invisible bridegroom, which she kept hidden and
nourished in the secret places of the soul, and she published abroad
the secret disposition of her heart-her hurrying towards Him Whom
she desired, that she might speedily be with Him, loosed from the
chains of the body. For in very truth her course was directed
towards virtue, and nothing else could divert her attention.
MACRINA'S DYING PRAYER
Most of the day had now passed, and the sun was
declining towards the West. Her eagerness did not diminish, but as
she approached her end, as if she discerned the beauty of the
Bridegroom more clearly, she hastened towards the Beloved with the
greater eagerness. Such thoughts as these did she utter, no longer
to us who were present, but to Him in person on Whom she gazed
fixedly. Her couch had been turned towards the East; and, ceasing to
converse with us, she spoke henceforward to God in prayer' making
supplication with her hands and whispering with a low voice, so that
we could just hear what was said. Such was the prayer; we need not
doubt that it reached God and that she, too, was hearing His voice.
" Thou, O Lord, hast freed us
from the fear of death. Thou hast made the end of this life the
beginning to us of true life. Thou for a season restest our bodies
in sleep and awakest them again at the last trump. Thou givest our
earth, which Thou hast fashioned with Thy hands, to the earth to
keep in safety. One day Thou wilt take again what Thou hast given,
transfiguring with immortality and grace our mortal and unsightly
remains. Thou hast saved us from the curse and from sin, having
become both for our sakes. Thou hast broken the heads of the dragon
who had seized us with his jaws, in the yawning gulf of
disobedience. Thou hast shown us the way of resurrection, having
broken the gates of hell, and brought to nought him who had the
power of death-the devil. Thou hast given a sign to those that fear
Thee in the symbol of the Holy Cross, to destroy the adversary and
save our life. O God eternal, to Whom I have been attached from my
mother's womb, Whom my soul has loved with all its strength, to Whom
I have dedicated both my flesh and my soul from my youth up until
now — do Thou give me an angel of light to conduct me to the place of
refreshment, where is the water of rest, in the bosom of the holy
Fathers. Thou that didst break the flaming sword and didst restore
to Paradise the man that was crucified with Thee and implored Thy
mercies, remember me, too, in Thy kingdom; because I, too, was
crucified with Thee, having nailed my flesh to the cross for fear of
Thee, and of Thy judgments have I been afraid.

Let
not the terrible chasm separate me from Thy elect. Nor let the
slanderer stand against me in the way; nor let my sin be found
before Thy eyes, if in anything I have sinned in word or deed or
thought, led astray by the weakness of our nature. O Thou Who hast
power on earth to forgive sins, forgive me, that I may be refreshed
and may be found before Thee when I put off my body, without
defilement on my soul. But may my soul be received into Thy hands
spotless and undefiled, as an offering before Thee."
As she said these words she sealed her eyes and
mouth and heart with the cross. And gradually her tongue dried up
with the fever, she could articulate her words no longer, and her
voice died away, and only by the trembling of her lips and the
motion of her hands did we recognize that she was praying.
Meanwhile evening had come and a lamp was brought in.
All at once she opened the orb of her eyes and looked towards the
light, clearly wanting to repeat the thanksgiving sung at the
Lighting of the Lamps. But her voice failed and she fulfilled her
intention in the heart and by moving her hands, while her lips
stirred in sympathy with her inward desire. But when she had
finished the thanksgiving, and her
hand brought to her face to make the sign had signified the end of
the prayer, she drew a great deep breath and closed her life and her
prayer together. |